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Tips on Mending a Troubled Relationship

Men are from Mars and Women are absolutely from another galaxy. Venus is too near. When men are upset with other men, they can generally just settle it with a quick brawl and be done with it after. Women on the other hand are different. They can simply say that they accept your apology, but a tugging in their genetic make-up will keep that anger brewing and sometimes even plotting inside. It can rear its ugly head at any moment, so good advice is needed to prevent this. Ask any girl and 90% of the time they will blame the guy for a failing relationship. So let’s say it’s just at that point of failing and its worth saving and more than a few ideas can help besides just unloading tons of flowers on her.

www.ezinearticles.com has a top ten line-up. The first of which is take responsibility for your own actions. Now, this does take a certain kind of maturity to handle yet is imperative to want to build the trust again by accepting your fault at face value. Don’t look or mention that you did this as a reaction to what she did and so on and so forth. That’s a never-ending battle that men will hardly win.

The second is to say the “S” word. Apologize immediately at the first opportunity. If you really want to keep her, then take it like a man and say that you are sorry at the onset. Don’t think of it as losing face, think of it as investing on more emotional building blocks for your future.

The third on the list would be the “L” word. Listen to what she has to say in SILENCE. Avoid rebuttals, innuendos and counter attacks, as these would surely add more heat in the kitchen.  I’m not the type of person to engage in such battles, some say it’s even healthy to have a go at it every now and then. But face it, save your energies for it’s the war you have to win, not just the battle.

Another article on the same site suggests to plan a diversion. There must be an activity or a place you both enjoyed in the past. Rekindling that moment can help alleviate a lot the current pains, jaunts and stabs in the heart. It can provide the spark to keep you guys going again.

Peter Fox, a couple’s therapist (www.peterfox.com.au) has more detailed articles on approaching the mending of a relationship. But I noted that one of his suggestions was to invite the sacred into your lives. I believe that this suggestion from an actual therapist is a proactive bond and does not necessarily require you to suddenly go extremely religious. It’s just that all people have something sacred that is held dear.  Sharing in such a meaningful practice can put a pulse back into the everyday lives of couples. Thanking for the food or graces that both of you enjoy regularly can actually be a weekly exercise to boost the faith in each other.

A significant contribution to this from www.ehow.com tells of a program called 12 steps to serenity. My take on its many instructions is just to consistently show her and tell her how important she is to your life. Some relationships are just meant for the moment but some are for a lifetime. If you remind her that she is the latter rather than the former then you can actually help cement her status in your emotional corridor while at the same time to keep active on being the same rock for her in her life.

There are many other suggestions you can pick up from the web but to my opinion, doing anyone two or three in the list above will be truly helpful in keeping your relationship in full health sooner than later.

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